Why Insomnia Is A Bad Thing

The night before my oldest started school, my youngest decided it was time to party. He was up at 11, 1:30, 3:00, 4:00 . . . well, you get the idea. Inbetween acts, because I was now so wound up, I couldn't sleep either. And this is what my tortured mind came up with:


Earlier that evening, my husband was watching one of his favorite reality shows, LA Ink, on TLC. Now I will be the first to tell you these tattoo artists are truly artists. The designs they come up with are great. Me personally, I like my art on canvas or photo paper, or carved into stone, not injected into my skin. That's just me. But as I was laying awake at 2:30 in the morning, a little voice said to me "Hey, if you were to get a tattoo, what would you get?" Now, bear in mind, I will never get a tattoo. Remember the part where they inject it into your skin? No thanks. But, hypothetically speaking, what kind of tattoo would I get? (Now is probably a good time to pause for a moment and let my mother and my mother-in-law's breathing come back to normal . . . ok, how ya doin? good, let's move on) Again, this is completely hypoethical, but I did think of some designs I think Kat Von D and her crew could work up rather nicely for me.


a: Rosie the Riveter, symbolizing strength, determination and a strong work ethic.


b: A Gardenia blossom. Gardenias have been one of my favorite flowers since I first visited Hawaii. I even tried to grow them in my desert of a back yard once. Guess how that one worked out?


c: A picture of my children. I'll never again have to say "sorry, I forgot my pictures." Remember, they inject them into your skin.


d: Something on my lower back. Nothing says class like a picture of Hello Kitty tattooed onto your lower back.


So, since I will never actually be getting a tattoo, I can enjoy designing the perfect one in my head. Let's hope my little guy sleeps through the night tonight. I don't think my mom could handle me even thinking hypothetically about random body piercings.